Going to the doctor.
1. An elderly man paid his doctor a visit.
    The doctor asked what's  your problem today?
     The old man said, it's my hearing, it's gotten so bad
    I can't hear myself fart.  The doctor reached on the shelf
    and picked up a bottle of pills.  He told the old man to take
   these as it say's on the bottle.  The old man started out the door
   turned around and asked?  Is this medicine going to help my hearing?
   The doctor said, of course not, it will make you fart louder.

2. An old man asked his doctor, what can I do about my problem?
He said I am not as young as I used to be, and my erections doesn't come
as often as they used to.  My problem is every time I have one it occurrs
while I am out working in my shop in my back yard.  By the time I rush in
the house the darn thing has gone away.  The doctor asked the old man
do you own a gun?  The old man said, yes I do.  The doctor said take your
gun to your shop, and the next time you obtain an erection fire your gun
and let your wife come to you.  The old man agreed to try it and left.
About five weeks later the doctor ran across the old man walking down
the street and asked, how did my idea work using the gun?  The old man
said, it worked great for a couple weeks and then hunting season came in,
and I aint seen her since.

3.  How many chiropractors does it take to change a light bulb?
Only one.  But he has to go back fourteen times to get it right.

4. A doctor told a patient I'm sorry I have you some bad news, you only have three weeks
to live.  The patient told the doctor I have you some bad news also, I can't pay my bill.
The doctor said okay, I'll give you three more weeks.

5. A man was taken into the emergency room after being in a car accident in which he cut off a hand.
The doctor in the emergency room told him I have a hand I can put on you but it came from a female.
The man said that's got to be better man no hand and all, put it on.  Several months after the surgery
the doctor bumped into the man and asked?  How's that new hand doing?  The man said, it's doing
great, but every time I take a piss I can't get that son of a bitch to turn lose.

6. A woman stepped in her doctor's office and the lobby was packed.  Not a seat to be found.
She spoke in a loud voice and said, looks like someone would let a poor pregnant women
have a seat.  A man, thinking it was the gentlemanly thing to do, jumped up and give her his seat.
While he was standing he was looking at the Lady, she was a very small person.  He said ma'am,
if you don't my me asking, you are not showing very much, exactly how long have you been pregnant?
The woman looked at her watch and said, about 45 minutes.

The Phunny Pharm........http:// go.to/dougsjokes.com